Equal Love

There is a campaign that I feel very strongly about: the Equal Love campaign. http://equallove.org.uk/

This campaign is about marriage equality in the UK. In the UK, marriage is exclusive to heterosexual couples, and civil unions are exclusive to homosexual couples. They contain almost identical benefits, but Equal Love believes that it is still discriminatory, that it's like a form of segregation. The website explains it more thoroughly, but I would like to explain to you my feelings on their cause.

I am a lesbian, and I want to get married someday. In fact, I seem to have more positive feelings about marriage than a lot of my straight friends, not to mention stronger maternal urges. I sometimes daydream about my wedding day, and about having a family with my wife when I'm older. I have NEVER daydreamed about having a civil ceremony.

You may argue that it's basically just a name change, but that really does matter. Because when you think about it, WHY did they give it a seperate name for same-sex couples? What's the point of that? Well, let's look at the connotations of the two names.

When people say the word marriage, certain images come to mind. White dresses, rings, roses, but more importantly, a loving couple who promise to be together forever. The concept of marriage is seared into the public conscioussness as being very romantic and beautiful.

The phrase civil union, on the other hand, has a very different feeling to it. It's very legal and formal: you'll probably think of a courthouse before a church or any other place. Actually, just saying that, same-sex couples in the UK can't have their civil ceremonies in places of worship, which is unfair for more concrete reasons, but that's more in the public eye, and may change soon. It seems like the issue I'm discussing isn't seen as important because it's "just a name".

But the only reason I can see for that name difference is homophobia. It's an attempt to support the idea that homosexual couples are somehow not as loving, monogamous or real as heterosexual couples, and that we don't deserve to be part of a tradition that has come to represent true love in so many people's minds the world over. It's a symbol of our oppresion and inferiority in society.

But we are not inferior. Love between two men or two women is just as good as love between a man and a woman. I don't care what anyone says, outright or discretely: I will never stop believing that. Sometimes I feel like I'm inferior to straight people, but logically, I know I'm not. Sometimes I feel so very lonely, because I'm surrounded every day by straight people. Sometimes the days just pass by as I sit wishing I was someone else. And this distinction between marriage for heterosexuals and civil unions for homsosexuals is only encouraging that. Words hurt. They can hurt more than the biggest bleeding wound. If you agree with me, and you're a UK resident (sorry, just the rules), sign the petition at the Equal Love website.